Friday 29 July 2022

Poem: Perhaps...


...during Lockdown

some Number 10 partygoers

stumble out of the door

and throw drunken gags at each other

and one says,

‘Hey, for a laugh, let’s go find one of

these hospitals 

where people are dying

and cheer’em up…’

and they stumble into cabs

and get to where Dick Whittington

heard the bells of London 

where the Whittington Hospital looks out over London

and they manage to get the works lifts to work

they jam in

ride to the 5th floor

to the intensive care ward

where visitors are strictly forbidden

and they crash into the ward

cheering and laughing

‘No need to bring your own booze

we’ve brought it.’

And they see us there

inert, plugged into tubes and lines

staring blindly 

trying to live

and they say to us

‘Hah! you think you’re in a bad way?

What about us?

We’re smashed.

It’ll be hell in the morning

but what the fuck!

You’re no bloody fun, are you?

Let’s go, guys..’

And out they stream

out of the hospital

into the night street

and one of them finds

Dick Whittington’s cat

in stone 

a statue of a cat

on the pavement

and it becomes the funniest thing

that any of them have ever seen

It’s a cat

it’s a fucking cat

It’s a statue of a fucking cat

and they have this great idea:

‘Let’s piss on it,’ one of them says

And that’s even funnier.